Life seems complicated at times and other times its not. For me life is what you make of it and what you want out of it. After all its you and only you who can say if it was worth it or not. There is many a time its been complicated for me and sometimes I ask myself why but the only thing is I make it complicated myself. when you dont need it to be.
I make thinks complicated when it comes to having needles. Yes I know I need them at times so the doctors can help and make sure they know what they are looking for but its not always that easy. I have always been surrounded by needles doctors hospitals and dare i say it men in white coates. No I don’t mean a mental hospital although at times I am sure I needed one at some point but I am me and me alone and I am sure they would kick me out after a day. People say to me stop been a baby or stop been stupid but if most of them have or had been what I have I am sure they would say the same thing. In fact they would. I also make things complicated at home sometimes, I am not an easy person to live with hey who is but well I do my own head in at times. But home is home for me only problem is recently I do not feel like Gloucester is my home, I am not saying North Yorkshire is either but I know in my heart Gloucester is not my home as I never felt welcome or right. At the time we made the choice to move away and now I can see it was a wrong move. But that is life and you have to make best with what you have.
The only thing that is not complicated by me is my little family. My hubby and animals. They are my little family so that is home for me they make me happy and even stop me from going completly mad. I love what Terry does for me you see he is not just my hubby he is my best friend and he is always there for me, even when people hate it we will always be together like I always say to them or at least in my head is well it not you I married it is Terry so that’s not my problem its your own. I know I have faults everyone does but i try. I try and do things for myself and this is something that people do not see. Either they do not want to see it or they just dont understand me. Which sometimes is a good thing. I dont want everyone to understand me but i know in my own heart that Terry does and that’s all that matters there.
My animals complet my little family, you can talk to them about anything and they never tell anyone. Sometimes when I do talk to them its like they know what I mean and they do not even have to tell me what they think. Animals are funny things they show their love in so many ways and diffrent ways. Take my sandy for example a whippit cross who has had a bad start in her early doggy years but since we have had her she has come on so much and she is so cheeky and full of spirt. She loves to be near you as long as I know I have my sandy I will always have the special bond we share as we understand each other in ways others can maybe see from a distance. I understand Sandy like she does me. Then there is sheppy a Jack Russle cross who is so loyal and loves to be with you all the time. He dose not like to be on his own for long as he hates it he likes to be in the thick of things either at myside or Terry’s side. thats our sheppy you see. He always sits outside the bathroom door when ever I go for a bath as he know from since he was a puppy to watch me and he always goes to Terry if I am in trouble or find it tough getting out of the bath,. You see its just the way our animals are the love to be near and care for us. Both loyal in their own ways and have so many cheeky bits that people do not see which is disapointing as they can not see why the dogs do not react to them as much as what they would with me or Terry and given a chance they would show a little bit of their cheeky sides. They also know when to be quiet or when we have important people coming to be very good and act cute which we find is funny which we know they are not always like it but makes people think that awww feeling about them both,.
Anyway like I said my life is complicated and always will be but only when you understand me and take the time to get to know me properly they maybe you will understand or other people will understand how i work and how i make it work. Bit of advice that my mum used to say is problem = solution other words if there is a problem there is always a solution to fix it somehow.
Until i Write again take care
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